By Barbara Ann Kipfer
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Additional info for 4,000 Questions for Getting to Know Anyone and Everyone
My mother shouted at Dad. She scooped me up brusquely and carried me inside where she and my dad had the worst ﬁght of my entire childhood. All I could do was stand helplessly by—knowing I was the cause. It was the single most horri fying moment of my ﬁrst ﬁve years. Who would think that such an early event would have such last ing repercussions? But it did. In fact, it still does. The ﬁrst time I became consciously aware of how this early event impacted my life was during our second year of marriage.
In short, we absorbed ways of interacting. I (Les) was blessed to The family is our refuge and spring- grow up in a loving home with board; nourished on it, we can advance lots of care and affirmation. I to new horizons. In every conceivable got along well with my two manner, the family is link to our past, older brothers, and we always bridge to our future. knew Mom and Dad loved 1 Alex Haley each other. But in all my grow ing up years, I rarely saw Mom and Dad express much affection in public.
So steer clear of conﬂict-avoidance and take care to be real. Finally, watch for sagging self-conﬁdence. It is only natural for your self-image to take a few blows in the midst of your parents’ divorce. You may have even suffered a serious depression at one time because of it. And even as an adult, the residue of pain from the breakup still remains. qxp 9/8/06 2:18 PM Page 57 Keeping Family Ties from Pulling Strings 57 You know it wasn’t your fault—that a parent leaves a marriage because of unhappiness with a spouse, not with a child—but you will have times when you feel stigmatized, defective, or even worthless because your family is not together.
4,000 Questions for Getting to Know Anyone and Everyone by Barbara Ann Kipfer